We are starting to see the tantrum behaviors manifest. As she has more autonomy through self-movement and develops preferences, sometimes we run into conflicts over wants. At present, these tantrums make me laugh because mainly they manifest as a little shuffle of her feet and the upset face. Occasionally Fleur lays down on the floor. Limited throwing, hitting, kicking, and screaming so far.
This Lifehacker article: Help Kids Calm Down With a ‘Brain Game’ looks interesting.
- Get their attention: They are consumed by their emotions, so it may be required to use a strange stimulus like a Light Switch Rave [1], jumping up and down, or making a silly noise.
- Offer: Whisper… “Hey, do you want to play a little game really quick? It will be fun.”
- The Game: “Can you point out <number> things that are <property>?” Do a few of these until has a big smile.
- Explain what you intended that caused the meltdown. (Build empathy.)
Essentially, the amygdala reacted. They won’t have a fully developed pre-frontal cortex to properly manage the amygdala until their 20s. So, need to help them interrupt the amygdala by leveraging to hippocampus and memory cortex to distract the amygdala long enough for us to explain.
[1] That was a Strong Bad email #45 from Homestarr Runner reference.
Polymath Parent 